I came to Lebanon knowing that one day, this day would come. I had planned for it on the rougher days here after the move, dreamt about it when things seemed less positive than I hoped for them to be. But now that the day is here, well in 26 days that is, I can't seem to wrap my head around it. So much has happened in the last year, and I owe a lot of it to the experience.
The experience of being dropped in a foreign culture and land and learning the ways to survive and adapt.
The experience of spending time with myself instead of constantly stretching and bending to be constantly surrounded by friends, family, or strangers.
The experience of what it means to be a Christian when separated from the support of a church and the community of family I had learned to depend on for so long, and only depending on God.
The experience of what it means to be a true friend; when it is your words and commitment that means more than grabbing coffee or superficial texts.
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The experience of being an American in the Middle East and learning the shortcomings my culture has in comparison and the strengths we have as well, but most importantly understanding form experience that I do not know everything, my nationality is not a trump card, and there is more to learn from others than ourselves.
Lebanon is an interesting country. Never would I thought I would say words such as, "I'll miss Lebanon," or that, "I can't wait to come back and visit," but it is true. Something about the people and the atmosphere of this country, with its lack of electricity, painfully slow internet and need for some hot water, combined with their traditions for thick, black, coffee and health and friendships above everything else; attaches you to it. I'm going to miss the layers of posters and graffiti along every wall surface of Beirut, the smell of freshly baked pastries and spices that come every morning. I'm going to miss the yells and honks that transform the traffic into something closer to a circus act, and the old Lebanese and Armenian ladies in their flower print dresses as they carry kilos upon kilos of vegetables, which they bought all for under a dollar. I'll even miss the quality of the air with the signature mix of the car fumes of a big city and the quirky add of the hookah smoke (and cigarettes).
Overall, I am sad to leave this place, to leave my mom and step-dad, and to leave the culture and friends I made while I have been here. But, in spite of all that I am excited and so thrilled to be going back. A year away from my family and my friends has made me miss those close to me more than I wish to be, and I can't wait to be back with them and get to tell stories of my crazy time abroad. I can't deny that this first thing I will get to do is not worry about when the electricity is cut today and I can finally throw away toilet paper in the toilet...which is a big deal! It will be weird to not take shared public transportation everywhere, or to walk all the time. It will be weird to have fresh air, which I gladly welcome, and for everyone on a street not to know me or to know each other...just the way the streets are again will b weird for a while.
So here is to the experiences, which in my opinion, I have been blessed this past year with a experience of a lifetime.
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